


brothers in more than names

by lacunia



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Neil and Jean talk, Post-Canon, i cannot for the life of me remember if this scene already happened in the books i am so sorry lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:08:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28583265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lacunia/pseuds/lacunia
Summary: Neil watches as Jean turns to face him so only one of his shoulder is against the wall now. They meet eyes, and Jean explains, “You gave me the strength to keep going. I figured that even if someone like you, someone cornered and someone with no hope for a future, could keep going, I could too. So…thank you.”“Thank me by forgiving yourself.” Neil replies, “What happened in Evermore was not your fault.”“It is not that simple.”“It could be.” Neil says easily. Jean turns away but Neil waves a hand in front of his face to make him look at him again, “Jean, I forgive you. You should too.”
Relationships: Neil Josten & Jean Moreau, Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 8
Kudos: 131





	brothers in more than names

**Author's Note:**

> i can't remember if these two already had this conversation?? so idk man sorry

Neil glances over at his teammates as he exits the court, feeling peaceful and at ease. Wymack had invited the Trojans over to the Foxhole Court for a quick practice match before break began, and instead of the atmosphere being heart-stopping and having the usual high stakes as a normal game night would, the vibe had been cheerful and playful. Neither teams had kept score, though Neil had a suspicion Kevin had and was keeping it to himself.

Neil went to follow the others into the locker room, but movement at the entrance of the stadium catches his eye. He see’s Jeans back exit the court, and he has the urge to follow after. They haven’t had a chance to speak ever since Jean left for USC, but Kevin had mentioned to Neil once or twice how the backliner was going in Southern California, weaselling the information from Jeremy and Coach Rhemann.

Jean had played well during the scrimmage, but Neil could tell he was still finding his spot in the team, still trying to figure out why or how his teammates were so nice. Neil was glad that Jean was with the Trojans, who were arguably the most ethical Exy team out there, as they are all patient and have good morals, a contrast to the Ravens and Evermore itself. 

He catches Andrew’s questioning glance and tilts his head to the exit in a ‘ _going to get some air_ ’ sign before starting after Jean. He exits the blinding orange stadium and is met with a colourless cloudy sky and damp grass. Neil spots Jean leaning against the brick wall, eyes closed and shoulders sagging lightly.

For a second, Neil almost regrets coming after him. He knows that Jean would rarely ever look as at peace as he does now, and he goes to turn back but grey eyes snap open and meet his own blue ones. Too late now.

Neil trudges forward and leans against the wall to the right of Jean, overlooking the parking lot. He keeps a safe distance between them, knowing Jean would appreciate it, and lets a comfortable silence overlap them. He’ll ask how Jean is doing soon, but for now he can enjoy the scent of rain in the air.

After a few moments of silence, Neil asks, “How are you going with the Trojans?”

Jean lets a limited amount of second’s pass before he slowly questions, “Why?”

“I…” Neil struggles to find his words, and he glances at Jean from the corner of his eye to find him already gazing down at him, “I know what it’s like. Adjusting. Adapting.” Jean blinks, and Neil continues, “I was nobody before Palmetto and now I am somebody. I know that it’s hard to let people in. it’s not easy, not in the slightest, but I’m glad to see you trying. You deserve it.”

There’s another passing moment of the two just listening to the sounds of the crickets chirping before Jean speaks again, “How can you stand to be near me?”

The question makes Neil frown, “What?”

“In Evermore, during Christmas break,” Jean explains, waving his hand once before he sighs heavily, “I held you down when Riko hurt you.”

Neil blinks, slightly surprised. He had no idea Jean blamed himself for what happened in Evermore. At the time, Neil had been mad, sure, but everything—his father, his uncle, Ichirou—had went so fast afterwards he hadn’t had time to think about the blurry memories of Evermore except when his nightmares haunted him.

“Riko would have hurt you otherwise,” Neil answers, “And you also washed my cuts. You gave me bandages and someone to lean on.”

Jean shakes his head, “It’s irrelevant. Maybe if I had been more like you then Riko wouldn’t have been able to hurt you without you fighting back.”

Neil tries to make sure he heard properly, “More like _me_?”

“You fought back.” Jean crosses his arms, “You hurled insults at everyone even if you looked like you had ten fistfights with an elephant.” He shrugs, “You are very stupid, but also very brave.”

Silence masks the atmosphere again. Neil has been called all types of things before, but brave is not one of them. Andrew’s _martyr_ could count as similar, but brave was something else. He hadn’t fought back to be _brave_ or _heroic_ , only to be more difficult.

Jean frowns and rubs his neck, “Thank you, for that, I suppose.”

“Why thank you? Me speaking back got us _both_ hurt.”

Neil watches as Jean turns to face him so only one of his shoulder is against the wall now. They meet eyes, and Jean explains, “You gave me the strength to keep going. I figured that even if someone like you, someone cornered and someone with no hope for a future, could keep going, I could too. So…thank you.” 

“Thank me by forgiving yourself.” Neil replies, “What happened in Evermore was not your fault.”

“It is not that simple.”

“It could be.” Neil says easily. Jean turns away but Neil waves a hand in front of his face to make him look at him again, “Jean, I forgive you. You should too.”

Jean looks at him in silence for another moment, but before either can say or do anything else, Jeremy’s calls out Jeans name, and Neil spots the Trojans bus pulling into the parking lot. Jean glances over his shoulder and then down at Neil, a small twitch of a smile forming on the corner of his mouth, “I have to go now, _petit renard._ See you at our next game.”

Neil nods and says, “We’re gonna beat your asses.”

“That sounds like a challenge.” Jean raises his eyebrows. 

Neil pointedly looks at the slight limp Jean has from when Neil crossed him during the match and then says, “If you’re up for it.”

He doesn’t stay to hear what the backliner says back, already turning back down into the stadium and weaving past Nicky and Matt to go into the locker room. He expects to see it empty, but he spots Andrew leaning against the lockers, eyes on the ceiling which turn to him when Neil steps in.

“You waited for me?” Neil asks, opening his locker.

Andrew ignores him and says evenly, “If he even looks at you the wrong way, he’s dead.”

Neil doesn’t have to ask to know he means Jean. He says, “I vividly remember telling you I can fight my own battles and you agreeing.”

“And _I_ vividly remember you then getting kidnapped and tortured,” Andrew shoots back and fists a hand in Neil’s jersey. Neil turns to face him.

“Careful, you’re starting to sound like you care about me.”

Andrew puts his other hand over Neil’s mouth and turns his head back to his locker, saying, “Shut up and hurry. Your teammates are probably going through their Neil Josten Withdrawal.”

Neil looks meaningfully around the empty locker room where Andrew had waited for him and then to hand attached to his jersey. He lightly takes Andrew’s hand off his mouth and says, “Actually, I think this means you are.”

Andrew doesn’t reply and shoves him towards the showers, and Neil smiles.

**Author's Note:**

> hope y'all enjoyed  
> also i hope that french bit worked? i don't speak french so feel free to correct me but the petit renard bit is supposed to mean little fox :)


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